my education

the problem is not the cruisy bathroom. the problem is me. what a surprise. how many ways can i degrade myself? honey, i might as well lick the floor. i mean obviously that guy didn't want to have sex with me. or maybe he does? there's always that chance. it's been over a year since he cruised me, got my phone number, never called me and proceeded to ignore me every time i saw him after that, but when i saw him walk into the fourth floor bathroom, i couldn't stop myself from following him. he's everything that i lust after: straight, asian, and mean. even after he rolled his eyes and grunted when i came and stood by him at the urinal, i wanted him. wanted him more. wanted him to fuck me like dog. thankfully someone walked in and stopped me from further degrading myself, from becoming a stalker, from harassing this poor closeted soul. just to be clear, he cruised me first. i was walking down the hall after class, and he was full-on looking at my dick and i understand why because those pants are scandalously tight. i mean, the lady wanted it badly. so when he went into the bathroom, of course, i followed. and of course we got interrupted, but then he got my phone number and he lives in san leandro which made it all the more exciting. but then he never called. and that's why i degrade myself. again and again. maybe the problem is school and how i'm trying to make that the center, my raison d'etre, but it's so not working, so not where i want to be, but then i don't know where i want to be...